2/2/09 - 2/8/09: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button; Taken; He's Just Not That Into You

Thoughts:
I gave the person I went to see this with a warning that it might invoke emotional tears from my eyeballs. The previews made it seem so poignant and touching. What a disappointment. I mean, I did tear up a little, but really...this movie seemed to drag on for ages, with no real payoff.


What I Learned:
If a girl has blue eyes, that's reason enough to fall instantly in love with her.

Growing backwards takes FOREVER. Seriously.

I have a new-found appreciation for Junior Mints.

























Thoughts:

Hoped for: Action-packed thriller featuring Liam Neeson kicking ass in new and magically wonderful ways.

Actually got: Not-so-action-packed thriller dealing with off-putting and uncomfortable situation, featuring Liam Neeson kicking ass for the sake of kicking ass.


What I Learned:
A man with all sorts of post-retirement government high-tech equipment should, at the very least, be in possession of a digital camera when he takes his daughter to the airport.

The true teenage rite of passage is following a popular band around the globe. Duh.

It is highly entertaining when you include the sentence, "Carrots?" during dialogue about crime lords and illegal activities...
...especially when it's done with a French accent.

Thoughts:

What a heaping pile of dog barf-vomit-poopoo. Holy chimney sweeps, this movie blew. But then again, so did the book. It was approximately 8 hours of whiny women, emotionally unattached men, leading up to a typical "happy fucking ending...everybody lives happily ever-fucking-after...wait until the right person comes along...it will happen for you...

...oh, but if it doesn't, that's okay too. You're awesome on your own!" What a fucking sucker-punch.


What I Learned:
The scariest moment of my life occurred when, upon leaving the theater I heard a woman utter the phrase, "Oh my gosh. That movie was SO TRUE!" (What the HELL?!)

There is a blatant misconception about women being needy, man-seeking, walking, talking biological clocks. This pisses me off more than you can imagine.

Ben Affleck is just scary now.